Sunday, May 20, 2012

The Hilarious G-8 Declaration Decoded

"Rewriting the Camp David Declaration
– or what they couldn’t say and why they said what they did
Preamble
1. We, the Leaders of the Group of Eight, met at Camp David on May 18 and 19, 2012 to address major global economic and political challenges (and to get out of our countries for a few days where things are getting downright oppressive).
The Global Economy
2. Our imperative is to promote growth and jobs, but we are failing miserably and do not have a clue what to do…
3. The global economic recovery shows few signs of promise, significant headwinds persist and we have not agreements on key areas of need. Each day the ECB gets more overextended and is without a plan. Below we offer up some nice sounding verbiage that won’t do a thing…
4. Against this background, we commit to take all necessary steps to strengthen and reinvigorate our economies and combat financial stresses, recognizing that the right measures are not the same for each of us and that each of us is likely to fail do exactly what is needed. Germany is more likely to be too austere; Greece is more likely to be too slow to implement any meaningful reforms. Political impasse in Greece continues to point a loaded gun at the head of the euro-or would do so if the euro had a head. Instead the gun is pointed at its financial groin.
5. We welcome the ongoing discussion in Europe on how to generate growth, while maintaining a firm commitment to implement fiscal consolidation to be assessed on a structural basis. This phrasing means nothing to everybody in Europe (or something different to everyone)! We agree on the importance of a strong and cohesive Eurozone for global stability and recovery, and we affirm our interest in Greece remaining in the Eurozone while respecting its commitments. This statement is 180 degrees at odds with where Greece seems to be politically at the moment, but the G-8 can agree on it and it sounds good. It does not reflect any new or existing consensus in Greece, unfortunately. We all have an interest in the success of specific measures to strengthen the resilience of the Eurozone and growth in Europe. But, again, we haven’t the foggiest idea how to do get it. We support Euro Area Leaders’ resolve to address the strains in the Eurozone in a credible and timely manner and in a manner that fosters confidence, stability and growth, but we cannot agree on what these things are, so don’t hold your breath waiting for results..."

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